Thursday, October 15, 2009

HUMOR IN LEAVE LETTERS


People in India write millions of leave letters each year. And in English! For, it has become a fashion to write leave letters in this 'Angrezi' language, albeit in real Desi (country) style. Here one finds English at its best. Here are a few samples:

FOR SALE
An employee applied for leave as follows: As I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one week leave.

TO GRAVE
Another employee applies for half a day leave: " Since I have go to the cremation ground and I may not return, please grant me half a day casual leave.

TO HEAD(ACHE) MASTER
A schoolgirl writes a leave letter to the headmaster: "As I am studying in this school, I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today."

PAINFUL
Another letter to headmaster: " As my head ache is paining very much, please grand me leave till the pain of my headache becomes less. "

M-I-L KILLER
One more leave letter: " As my mother-in-law has expired and I am responsible for it, please grant me leave for ten days. "

SOLE SPOUSE
A letter written for leave: " My wife is suffering from childbirth and as I am her only husband, kindly grant me leave.

NEUTRAL APPLICANT
A candidate's application for a job: " This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' typist and an accountant, male or female. As I am both for the past several years, I am applying for the post.
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