WEDGED IN WEDDED LIFE

HUSH TALK
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Then one day the man realised that he needed his wife to wake him at 5.00 am to catch an early flight. Not wanting to be the first one to break the silence, he finally wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me up at 5.00 am."

The next morning the man woke up, only to discover that it was 9.00 am, and that he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed which read, "It is 5.00 am; wake up."
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REGRETS
A husband was heard to confess that in the early months of his marriage he was so much in love with his wife that he wanted to eat her. And as the years rolled by, he increasingly regretted that he had not.
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SAVED BY WEATHER
Rekha screamed at her husband for over 20 minutes. Finally, he exclaimed, "That's it! I am fed up. I am leaving!"

"Oh!" cried the wife. "Where are you going?"

"Where I will never bother you again," replied the husband. "A place far away from here. A place in the jungles where I will not bother about life or death. Or into the stormy seas....."

He opened the door and looked out. Then he shut it and said, "It is lucky for you that it is raining. I have deferred my plans."
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HAPPY NEWS
"I am afraid Mrs Prabhu, your husband will never be able to work again," said the doctor sadly.

"I'll go in and tell him. It might cheer him up," replied Mrs Prabhu.
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BETTER (H)EAR
Wife(whispering in her husband's ear): Darling, may I have Rs 500 for a sari?

Husband: I can't hear so well in that ear, dear. Please come around to the other side.

Wife(into the other ear): Honey, may I have Rs 1000 to buy a sari?

Husband: Come around to the Rs 500 side again.
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