WOMAN, THY NAME IS.....

CHIVALRY

Proprietor to clerk: You didn't show much courtesy to that lady customer.

Clerk: Well, that's the only thing in the shop I didn't show her.
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HOLY COW!

A farmer's elderly mother was in a nursing home. The doctor had advised brandy as a part of her treatment. But the old lady was a strict teetotaller. So, the son always added brandy to cow's milk before giving it to her.
She drank the milk without a word.

But one day she said to her son, "Son, could I ask you a favour?"

"Certainly," replied the son.

"Please," she begged him, "don't ever sell that cow. It's milk is heavenly!"
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FORE-WARNING

Ticket inspector on a train: You ladies can start looking through your handbags for your tickets. I'll be back in half an hour.
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TWIN REQUEST

A woman rang up her insurance company and said she wanted to change the terms of her insurance policy. "I have just had twins." she informed the manager.

The insurance manager had difficulty in hearing her and asked, "Can you repeat that, please?"

The woman shot back emphatically, "Certainly not, sir. Having twins again is no joke."
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BLACK WIDOW

A woman was on trial for murdering her husband. A stern sentence appeared imminent. Before announcing the sentence, the judge asked her if she had anything to say in her favour.

"Your honour," said the woman, "you should be compassionate with me while deciding upon the sentence. After all, I am a widow."
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THE ROAR

A tour guide was taking a group of women tourists to the Niagara Falls. As they reached the destination, the guide announced, "Women, if you keep quiet for some time you can hear the roaring sound of the Niagara Falls."
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